


When the Stars Were Ours

by LauraRoslinForever



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Dad Kane, F/M, Fluff, Kabby, Season one Kabby, Sexy Times, rewriting the 100, what if, you just gotta expect this from me now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-07
Updated: 2019-04-02
Packaged: 2019-09-13 17:06:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16896579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LauraRoslinForever/pseuds/LauraRoslinForever
Summary: “Pour me a damn drink.”His eyebrows lifted when she looked over at him but he did as she asked without saying another word. When he came back, she saw he had refilled his own glass and poured her one with its own significant amount.What the hell, she thought. They were all going to die anyway.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If I could have it my way, this is how the story would have gone.

_Abigail Griffin was mad._

_No, mad wasn’t the word. Incensed. That was more like it. Her blood pounded in her veins at the same rapid succession of her heart, her hands clenched and unclenched with every step that took her closer and closer to his quarters._ The nerve of that asshole, _she had thought for maybe the thousandth time that day. They had three months of air, three months of life left -unless a miracle happened- and he had the nerve to go and break her best friend’s heart?_

_He was damn lucky someone as beautiful, sweet, and kind as Callie even wanted to be with him and not think him the heartless bastard everyone else on this ship did, including her._

_She would have let it go if they weren’t dying. But as they were, as they had such little time left, she was going to make the most of it._

_Reaching his quarters, she raised her hand and banged her fist hard on the steel door. In the seconds that passed, she tried hard not to think about all the times she’d stood in front of his door. Whether it was to speak to Callie, or collect her husband who had spent hours watching soccer (a game Marcus preferred over Americanized football Jake and Thelonious bonded over) back when they were all friends._

_Back before the need to live and protect their people became more critical than ever, and with that, more important than their relationships._

_She hadn’t had to wait long for him to open it and when she looked up to meet his dark, startled eyes she didn’t bother asking his permission to come in, she just stepped purposefully around him. She sure as hell wasn’t having this conversation out in the hall. No matter how much she thought he deserved to be humiliated on his own doorstep._

_“You're a real bastard, you know that?” she told him. but the moment the words slipped from her lips, she immediately regretted them as she came to a halt._

_“Good evening to you, too,” his voice said dryly from behind her. “Please, come in.”_

_Abby had been too embarrassed to reply with her unusual witty response. Her eyes held the woman’s sitting across the room on the couch holding a cup, staring back at her. She felt heat rise up from her neck into her cheeks. “Oh, Vera, I didn’t know you were… I'm sorry.”_

_There had been a time when she was younger when she would attend Vera’s services and Marcus would be there quiet, reserved like he was now but so much softer, kinder. A lot like his mother who was looking between them with a sort of motherly curiousness._

_Vera shook her head and rose to her feet. Setting the cup on the small table in front of her, she said, “Well, Marcus, it sounds like you and Abigail have things you need to discuss. I’ll come visit you some other time.” Abby opened her mouth to argue, to apologize for her harsh words, and for storming in like she had but Vera’s hand on her arm stopped her. “It’s alright.”_

_Marcus brushed by them without looking at either of them. “Good night, Mom.”_

_Vera looked over to her son whose back was facing them, then turned her gaze and smiled gently at her. “Go easy on him, dear.” Her tone was soft and held that motherly love and hope all parents carried for their children, despite how abhorrent their actions could be._

_It reminded Abby that to Vera, Marcus was still that soft-spoken incredibly shy young boy all those years ago, and always would be. As a mother, she understood that even if she thought Marcus to be an unredeemable asshole._

_“Mom-” Marcus said, his tone chastising but his look when she turned to face them was almost pleading with her. Abby’s eyes narrowed as she wondered what on earth Vera could say to her he wouldn’t want her to hear._

_Vera’s hand on her arm pulsed, and she gave her one last Vera Kane smile before saying, “It was nice to see you, Abigail.”_

_The sound of her name was enough to soften her features, make her smile genuinely in return. Only her own mother called her Abigail to everyone else she had always been Abby, with the exception of Vera and on occasion, Thelonious. She always had a fondness for Vera. She was a kind, gentle spirit who always looked out for everyone. Abby placed her hand over Vera’s and gave it a squeeze. “You too, Vera.”_

_Neither her nor Marcus said a word while Vera made her way from the room and out the door. And it wasn’t until moments after the firm clasp of the door as it closed did Marcus speak._

_“So Abby, to what do I owe the pleasure?” he asked, moving into his small kitchen. She watched as he reached up and took a bottle from the shelf, then reached for a glass. Her eyes took in his arms and his back, and she realized with heat flooding her cheeks once again that he hadn’t been wearing his usual sweater but just a worn form-fitting black tee. “Would you like a drink?” he called over his shoulder._

_She let out a sigh, her ire coming back to her at her reaction to not only his physique but the ease at which he carried the conversation like she was there on a social call which he knew damn well she wasn’t. It was all so infuriatingly ridiculous she could remotely be distracted by a pair of arms and so annoyingly_ Kane _she could scream. “No, thank you, but would like to know why you broke my best friend’s heart.”_

_His eyebrows rose but that was the only recognition he gave to her comment as if she was merely remarking on what was being served in the mess hall and not the end of his own relationship. “Oh. Is that all?”_

_She frowned crossed her arms over her chest. “Is that all? Is that all_ you _have to say for yourself?”_

_He took up his drink and raised it to his lips. She cursed herself for letting her eyes wander down his neck and linger on the way his Adam’s apple bobbed when he swallowed._ _What the hell was wrong with her? “Firstly,” he said, “I don't feel I have to justify my actions to you, but if you really must know,” he paused and smirked at her, “and we both know that you do, it wasn't working.”_

_Her mouth dropped open._ _She couldn’t believe the nerve of him and told him as much._ _“We’re all going to die but go ahead and hurt the one person who tolerated you.”_

_Marcus gave her a look of mild exasperation before his face fell back into its mask of stoic neutrality. “I'm sorry she's hurt, but she'll get over it. I had my reasons for doing what I did.”_

_There was something about the way he wouldn’t look her directly in the eye. The way they lingered on his glass, on the view outside, hell, even on her lips but not at_ her _. Any other time he would have been staring into them with the same cold fury she stared back into his but this seemed different somehow._

_“What reasons are those?” she challenged with a tilt f her chin._

_He studied the view of Earth a moment, then finally he said, “Truthfully? I was tired of living a lie. Callie and I's relationship, if you want to call it that, was over a long time ago.” He finished off his drink his gaze down at the bottom of his glass. “So you’ll forgive my surprise that I’m seeing you here. I didn’t think our separation would be that big of a deal to her. It was never about love for either of us.”_

_Her jaw fell open slightly. Indignance and anger rose up making the blood in her veins boil, not for her but for Callie. How could he think that just because it wasn’t love that she wouldn’t, if not anything, care, even a little bit? Abby honestly couldn’t think about what had happened to him to make him separate any kind of feelings from the physical. God, he was infuriating. She wanted to slap him._

_“You really are a bastard, Kane.” Her arms dropped by her sides. “I don't know why I bothered.”_

_She had been about to turn and leave, but his gaze met hers and the intensity in them somehow managed to keep her feet rooted to the spot. He took a step towards her and then another. “I know you think the worst of me, and you especially have every right to hate me for the things that I’ve done. The decisions I’ve made have always been in the best interests of our people… and Callie, well… I don’t deny I could have continued the farce, but she deserves better with the short time that we all have left.”_

_His voice was soft, almost like the words he spoke meant something to him. That he actually felt them. Suddenly, Vera’s words came back to her._

Go easy on him, dear.

_Why had she said that? Had they been talking about this before? Somehow she doubted Marcus would ever open up to anyone, even Callie had told her he was a man of very few words but Vera’s tone suggested she may have been wrong. And she didn’t know why but it made a curiosity rise up in her. Had her arms uncrossing and walking over to his view of Earth._

_“Pour me a damn drink.”_

_His eyebrows lifted when she looked over at him but he did as she asked without saying another word. When he came back, she saw he had refilled his own glass and poured her one with its own significant amount._

What the hell, _she thought. They were all going to die anyway._

_They ended up on his couch. Her on one end and him at the other. They drank together silently for a while. She wasn’t sure how long, but it was long enough for the alcohol to make her head feel a bit lighter, to blur her reality around the edges for her to see and remember him as the man he used to be, the friend he used to be, and not the jackass councilman the air crisis had turned him into._

_“I don’t hate you.”_

_He scoffed then took a drink. “Could have fooled me.”_

_“Please,” Abby said and reached for the bottle that was now nearly empty and sitting on the table in front of them, “don't act so insulted. It’s not like I don’t drive you crazy.”_

_He chuckled, actually laughed and, as light as it was, it was then she realized it’d been years since she heard such a sound come from him. “You are an insufferable pain in the ass,” he told her with a half smirk pulling the edges of his lips up._

_Whatever fondness she began to feel fled from her. Looking away from the warmth, she found in his eyes, despite his words, she frowned into her own glass as she lifted it to her lips. The slow burn that the drink had been before was now a muted, dull warmth. She swallowed, and murmured, “Don’t hold back, Kane.”_ _  
_

_“Know-it-all, stubborn, contrary…”_

_She looked over at him and blinked. “Contrary?”_

_But he wasn’t listening, still rattling off words like he hadn’t heard her. “Bitter, holier-than-thou, aggravating…”_

_She sat up and put her glass down on the table. “You know what; I could make a list about you, you know. How about uncompromising, closed-minded, pig-headed.”_

_He sat up and placed his drink down beside hers, then turned his body towards her and with one word, challenged, “Emotional.”_

_Emotional? Ha! She wanted to laugh. “At least I have emotions,” she retorted. “Which is sadly, more than I can say for you.”_

_His mouth twisted up into that classic crooked smirk of his. The one what made her want to slap it from his face half the time and the other half, well, she wasn't going to think about the other. “If you only knew.”_

_“Knew what? Is there anyone you care for, Kane?” she taunted shifting closer hoping to hit a nerve._

_His face, however, only softened as he told her, “As a matter of fact, there is.”_

_“Yeah right,” she murmured, only now realizing as she looked deeply into his eyes how close they really were. “Let me guess. She hates you too?”_

_His eyes seemed to search hers, for what she couldn’t be sure. His voice was so low that if there had been others in the room, she would have been the only one to hear. “She said she doesn’t, but I’m starting to think she said that just to be nice.”_

_“I don’t blame her,” she began, her own lips lifting into a smile. “Who would be nice to you?” The look in his eyes told her all she needed to know and should have probably known all along. Oh._

Oh.

_She swallowed. “How long?”_

_“Forever,” he said simply like the word didn’t hold a thousand different implications. She placed her fingertips against her lips. Her shoulders shook with her silent laughter. His face fell then and he looked away from her and reached for his drink. “You’re laughing at me. I suppose it is funny,” he said and tipped back his drink, finishing it off before placing it back on the table, “loving someone you can never have, someone you could never deserve.”_

_Abby’s mouth fell open slightly. No. He had to be pulling her leg. This all had to be some kind of joke. Love her._ Her! _All this time?_

_She got to her feet, needing some distance between them. “Why are you telling me this now?”_

_He stood too and stared at her a moment before saying simply, “You asked. And I’m tired of denying it.”_

_“How can you say that you.... that you love me and do all the things that you do?” she paused had thought of every disagreement, every action, every bitter word spoke against the other and all this time he had feelings for her? “You fight me on everything. You included my daughter in Jake’s charges, and you think you can stand here and say that you love me so easily? I don’t even think you know what the word means.”_

_“You’ve obviously formed your opinion of me, but I will say this, as a final defense, had I not done what I did, persuaded the other council members to concede to solitary confinement, despite her age your daughter would have been floated right next to,” his words trail off leaving out the unsaid words “your husband” hanging in the air like a tangible thing that had been standing between them all these years, until finally, he said, “right next to Jake.”_

_She didn’t know what to think or do. “And you think that makes up for everything else?”_

_“No, I don’t. But I hoped it would be a start. Whether you choose to believe it or not, I am sorry for what happened. He was my friend and I… I wish things could have been different. I apologize for disappointing you.” She wasn’t sure what made her do it. All she knew was that one moment she was gazing into his regret-filled eyes and the next she was walking over, closing the distance between them,  and pressing her lips to his._

_She had brought her hands up to run through fingers through his perfectly combed hair and found it softer than she expected it to be. To his credit, it only took him half a second to catch up with her. His arms wrapped around her waist and pressed her against him. One hand cupped her cheek, fingers tangled in her hair, before he drew away enough to murmur, “Abby… what are-”_

_“Stop talking,” she said into the scant space between their lips._

_“You don’t have to do this.”_

_She moved away enough to look into his eyes. “Do you really want me to leave because I will. If not, shut up and-” But whatever she was about to say was cut off as he closed the distance to kiss her and wrap his arms around her, pulling her against him once again. Her heart knocked heard in her chest, so hard she was sure he’d be able to feel it. And while she tried to tell herself this would mean nothing, she couldn’t deny the way her belly swooped when his tongue swiped against her lips and the tremble in her thighs when their mouths softened and opened for the other._

_There was a moan then, his or hers, both of theirs, she couldn't be sure._

_Reaching down, he grabbed her by the back of her thighs and lifted her up. Her legs wrapped around his hips as he walked them across the room, towards his bedroom. She broke the kiss then, stopping him in his tracks, with her words, “God, Marcus....wait.” He looked at her like she was going to tell him she changed her mind that this wasn’t what she wanted, and it surprised her how much she wanted to reassure him that it was. “This stays between us.”_

_He seemed to understand what she meant because his look softened, and he replied, “She knows how I feel about you.”_

_That brought her up short. Surprised and yet completely unsurprised. “Still, I can’t… we can’t-”_

_“We don’t have to do this. You don’t have to-”_

_“Marcus, just…it’s just this once and only once.”_

_“Whatever you say.”_ _  
_

_He walked them back through his quarters to his bed where he spent the next few hours making their just once feel like it would never end._

_Just like her first memory began, it shifted as she came apart under the weight of him, as he followed her over the edge._

_It was nearly a month later, and she was making her way back to her quarters after washing up and leaving medical._

_Fifty-one hours of air._

_Less than that now, she thought right before her steps had slowed. She hadn't expected to run into anyone given how late it was but the fact that he was making his way towards her made her belly swoop._

_“Abby.”_

_“Marcus,” she said and looked down into his hands. “What’s that?”_

_He looked down. “An old bottle of wine. It was my mother’s she was saving for… well, it doesn’t matter now. Care to join me for a drink?”_

_A drink._

_Images from all those weeks ago when they shared their last drink came to mind, their ‘just once’ before everything fell apart; before Thelonious was shot, and she made the decision to do everything to save him; before Marcus was strong-armed by the council to float her (but he had thankfully fought for her instead of against her,); before Callie died._

_Suddenly, she didn’t care anymore._

_“Why not?” She held out an arm. “Lead the way.”_

_She followed him numbly to his quarters and once there he placed the wine on the small table just inside and shrugged off his jacket, tossing it haphazardly on a nearby chair. The move was so unMarcus she raised a brow, slightly amused that it took them all dying for him to loosen up._

_Before she knew it he had retrieved two glasses and she watched as he poured them each a substantial amount. She took it gratefully and sighed as the red alcohol left a wonderful burn, an aftertaste of smoke and chocolate, maybe? Though she couldn’t be sure. She only tired chocolate once in her life._

_Walking over to the window, she stood there for long moments. The view of Earth was exceptional from his quarters. She thought about Clarke down on the ground. What she might be doing. If she was safe. If they were all safe. How she could be down there now with her if it wasn’t for Diana._

_And just like that, she wasn’t sad anymore. She was angry._

_“I never liked that bitch.”_

_From across the room, Marcus choked on the drink he’d just taken. She turned to face him, raising a brow. After clearing his throat, he said, “You’re not the first one to call her that in the last few days.”_

_“She’s lucky I won’t be joining them down there,” she grumbled, wrapping one arm around herself while taking another long drink._

_He chuckled. “Knowing you like I do, I’d say she’s very lucky.” His gaze fell away from hers, onto his bandaged hand. She had put a numbing spray and salve on it earlier that day. With all the work they had been doing it probably needed to be cleaned again._

_“How’s your hand?” she asked, moving over to him._

_“It’s fine,” he told her but made no move to stop her from taking his hand in hers._

_“I should take a look at it.” She set her glass on the table and turned his hand over, intent on unwrapping the bandage but before she could his other hand fell over hers stopping her._

_“Abby.” Her eyes slid up to meet his. His look said everything. Held everything. What’s the point? They said._

_She sighed softly then swallowed past the lump in her throat. “I haven’t thanked you. For saving my life.”_

_His voice was soft in his reply. “It was the least I could do after… everything.”_

_Everything._

_It was funny how she looked at him now. How quickly things had changed. Maybe it was the night that they shared. Maybe it was because around her he let down some of his walls enough for her to see the Marcus she remembered. Maybe it was because they were about to die. Whatever it was, in that moment, she didn’t want to lose what had only begun to build between them._

_She looked down where she was still holding his injured hand in hers. “I don’t want it to end like this, Marcus,” she confessed hating how much her voice trembled._

_“I know.” When she looked back up. His eyes flicked from hers to her lips. She knew then he was going to kiss her. And she was going to let him. “Abby, I-”_

_The next thing she knew his lips were on hers. Urgent and confident, but oh, so achingly gentle._

_This time, there was no guilt or shame hanging over them. The only regret was that they hadn't had more time._

Abby woke with a start. Her heartbeat pounding from her dream. From the memory of not so long ago. Of Marcus’ lips on hers, the feel of him pressing her into the bed, of _him_ pressing into _her._

She groaned.

These dreams needed to stop. Not that she didn’t _mind_ them. She and Marcus had been growing closer since they’d been on the ground, but with everything in a constant state of turmoil, there hadn’t been time to really talk about their relationship until recently.

Her face heated thinking about their night together a few days before. Marcus had come to give her a status report on training with the grounders. He’d been so exhausted and sore she’d taken a bit of pity on him and rubbed his shoulders and neck while he spoke, though he hadn’t really said much between moans which amused her more than anything.

Sometime later, without saying a word he took her hand and pulled her in front of him. She dropped down into his lap, and it was her turn to moan when he took her by the hips and showed her just the effect she had on him.

She had been just about to suggest they go somewhere a bit more comfortable when there was a knock on the door. An emergency appendectomy that had her in medical for the rest of the night. As tired as he had been she hadn’t asked him to wait up for her.

Another crisis had come. Another person trying to kill her daughter.

Getting up, she got ready for the day. Marcus would be leaving the next day to Tondc, and she wanted to catch him and talk about things before he left. She was just making her way to the door when her world tilted and she closed her eyes as her vision swam. A step back and another and she leaned against her desk, grasping the edge as she took deep breaths until the dizziness passed, and only then did she dare open her eyes.

She stood slowly and thought back to how long it’d bed since she'd eaten. It’d been awhile. Chalking lightheadedness up to low blood sugar, she finished getting ready, telling herself she'd stop by the mess on the way to check on things in medical.

She smiled tightly at those who passed her in the hall, giving only Jemma Dougal a real genuine smile and hug seeing the young girl waddle down the hall. The young girl had lost her husband during Diana’s bombing on the Ark, and now seven months pregnant was now on her own. It’d been hard at first for her, but Abby tried to remind her what she did have, and with the approaching birth of her child she smiled more and more, at least, when she wasn’t complaining to Abby how long it was taking. Abby remembered those days. The last few weeks of her pregnancy with Clarke when she thought she would never come. The swollen ankles, the constant fleeing for the bathroom, the feeling like everywhere she turned her belly would knock something over.

And that had been the easy part. Not like in the beginning when she’d been plagued with nausea and dizziness, exhaustion and dreams. Those days she wondered why anyone would willingly put themselves through such an ordeal.

She chuckled to herself. If she didn’t know any better she would think...

Abby's steps slowed to a stop. Her brow furrowed a moment, but then she shook her head and continued down the hall. _No_ , she thought. It was impossible. A coincidence. All of those things could be associated with a number of other things, including stress and lack of sleep. She sure had an abundance of each lately.

It was a ridiculous thought, especially at her age.

There wasn’t enough time for her to be pregnant. But then she counted back the days. They’d been on the ground for a little over two weeks and before that, there had only been the once a little over six weeks ago. She nearly groaned aloud as her thoughts strayed back all those weeks and to all the what ifs. A traitorous voice whispering, _well it’d be your own fault for removing your implant._

Just then Sinclair rounded the corner asking after Raven, and thankful for the distraction, she fell into step beside him.

_No_ , she thought with finality.

She was most definitely _not_ pregnant.

The day wore on and by noon she found it hard to keep her mind focus on much of anything let alone the food reports.

“Do you need some help with that, Abby?”

Abby dropped the datapad she'd been holding. Looking up, she blinked at him from where she sat at her desk to see Jackson’s dark eyes gazing down at her in concern. “What? No. No, I'm fine.”

He frowned at her. “You don't look fine. You look tired and pale.” Abby bristled at that, however true it may have been. “I'm surprised Kane hasn't stopped by yet to drag you off to rest.”

The edges of her lips pulled up. Since making Abby chancellor, Jackson had eased up a bit on Marcus. Grown to respect him, if not a little fond of him. He seemed to trust him around her anyway, and that was a start.

“He’s busy with something today.”

“In that case, do you want to go grab some lunch?”

“No, thank you. You go. I'll be fine here.” Truthfully, she didn’t think she could eat anything at the moment. Her nerves and her stomach were in knots.

“You sure? You haven't eaten today,” he observed making her wonder if he and Marcus were in cahoots.

She tilted her head to the side trying not to smile. “Jackson, you're as bad as Marcus, go.” She pointed in the direction of the doors.

He laughed. “Alright. See you in a bit.”

When he was gone, she let her head fall into her hands. She needed to stop this. There wasn’t one productive thing she was getting done today. Marcus was going to be leaving to Tondc. She needed make sure he had a guard escort, and talk with Miller about tightening the safety around camp while he was gone. There was too much to do, there wasn’t time for her mind to be in other uncertain places when it didn’t need to be.

She needed to know and be done with it.

She rose to her feet and headed over to the cabinet. She was going to test herself and get it over with. That way she could stop thinking about it. After all, she wasn’t. It was ridiculous to even consider. A simple little blood test and she could get back to work. Thankfully, Jackson was gone. Medical wasn’t busy so no one was there watching her.

Ten minutes later, she stood frowning down at the datapad waiting for the results, tapping her fingers impatiently on her desk trying hard not to think about all the implications that would come from anything besides a negative when a soft voice came from behind her, “Hey.”

At the sound of Marcus’ voice, the datapad slipped from her hand and dropped to the floor. Before she could reach for it, he bent over and picked it up. Her breath caught in her chest, but he didn’t look at it. His eyes were only for her as he handed it back.

“Oh, hello,” she said though it came out a little more breathless than she intended.

Hands on his hips, he looked around the room. “Where's Jackson?”

She cleared her throat, told herself to get a grip, and replied, “I sent him to get lunch.”

“Oh,” he said, his face falling in obvious disappointment. “I was hoping to talk you into getting some lunch with me.”

As wonderful as that sounded, there were other things pressing for her attention at the moment, and depending on how the results came out, she didn’t think she’d be able to keep it from him with him right beside her if she were wrong. “I'm going to be busy in here all day I'm afraid. Unless you have something urgent for your chancellor?” She smirked over at him, hoping to distract him from not only her brush off but from sensing anything might be off. Because he would. Marcus was annoyingly observant when it came to reading her.

It’d worked. He smiled back, and it made her feel even more guilty for it. “No, nothing urgent. I was just wanting to spend some time with you that's all. You've been stretched so thin between jobs it hasn't left much time for us to finish our evening together.”

“I know, I'm sorry. We’ll have more time after you get back. Once I get done here, I just want to sleep.”

“Of course.” He reached across the desk, putting his hand over hers and give it a small squeeze. “If you change your mind, you know where to find me. If not I’ll see you in the morning before I leave.”

Her throat was tight with emotion, but she managed a small nod and a soft, “Alright.”

She watched him leave and waited until his footsteps faded away before looking down at the datapad in her hand. Her eyes scanned the results, her heart coming to a shuddering halt as she sat back down in her chair.

She didn’t know whether she wanted to laugh or cry.

* * *

 

The following morning Marcus Kane woke with a pain that radiated across his shoulders and up his neck. He’d fallen asleep reading a data pad and his head awkwardly fell to one side half lying half sitting up in bed. He’d been so tired he hadn’t moved and by God, he wished that he had. He’d already been sore from training. Sparing with Indra had been eye-opening, to say the least, one thing was for sure, it was going to be a hell of a walk to Tondc.

He had hoped he’d wake up with Abby curled up next to him like he sometimes did since he’d returned from being held captive. But she did need sleep, and well, he thought with a smirk he couldn’t completely wipe away, most of the time when she stayed getting plenty of rest wasn’t always at the forefront of either of their minds.

Slashing some water on his face, he grabbed a towel from the shelf. He took in his reflection in the cracked mirror. Tired, dark circles appeared under his eyes. Days worth of stubble dusted his cheeks and jaw. A different man than he was before on the Ark stared back at him. _A better man,_ he thought, allowing himself a small moment to recognize thanks to the ground, thanks to Abby. With them both he was able to forge a new path for himself. One that allowed for hope.

He smiled to himself and got ready for the morning. He pulled on the thick pair of socks Abby had shoved into his hands when she discovered his last pair had seen the last of their good days a week after they made it to the ground. Everything they owned was handed down to them. Washed with extensive care to be used again and again, generation after generation. But there was only so much they could do to preserve some things. Socks and shoes. The most worn, heavily used were a luxury.  She didn’t tell him where she got them, and he didn’t ask.

Outside, he was just about to go look for Abby before they left when he saw her walking over to their group.

“Morning,” he said and smiled at her but the look of complete and utter exhaustion on her face made his smile slip into a frown. “Did you even sleep?”

She let out a long deep sigh and looked away from him. His eyes took her in. Her tense posture, the deep crease between her brows. If he had to guess, he’d say something was wrong but the way she’d been avoiding him for the last day he wasn’t sure he wanted to know the reason behind it.

Finally, she looked up at him and with a smile that was barely there, said, “Not much, I’m afraid.”

Had they been inside his quarters or hers he would have pulled her into his arm, would have wrapped his arms around her and held her close to provide her a little moment of comfort they’d been drawing and giving one another over these last few weeks.

As it was, they weren’t so instead he reached up and gave her elbow a light squeeze. “Try and get some rest while I’m gone?”

“I’ll try,” she told him. Her eyes held his long enough to reassure him but when he went to pull away her hand caught his making him pause. “Marcus, be careful.”

“I will.” His brow furrowed once again noting the way her eyes dropped away from his as if there were something in them she didn’t want him to see. Ever since yesterday she’d been, he wanted to say distant but then thought it was just their time on the ground catching up to her. Now he knew something was off. “Abby, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she said still not looking at him. He stood there, unmoving waiting for her and she must have known he wasn’t going to budge until she said more because she let out a long sigh then raised her chin and when her eyes met his heart sunk. Her warm brown eyes glistened like she’d been holding back tears. “The truth is I’m not feeling very well.”

He reached out, took her by the elbow and led her away from anyone who could overhear them. “Would you rather I stayed?”

“No, it’s nothing that serious. And you need to be there.” She sniffed then looked back up at him with that fierce determination he loved. “I’ll be fine.”

He was reluctant to go, but she was right, he needed to be there. “Alright well, take it easy until I get back. Once this summit behind us and we get the kids back hopefully we can make our way toward some kind of peace.”

She smiled softly. “Peace would be nice for a change.”

He looked over his shoulder when someone cleared their throat. Members of the guard were waiting for him, Octavia and Lincoln standing over by the fence. Turning back toward her, he lowered his voice and said, “If we weren’t standing out here in the open I’d kiss you.”

His words brought another smile to her face, this one rueful. He would have lowered his head and let his lips fall over hers soft ones in a languid kiss that would have sent a shiver up his spine and warmed his chest like the sun on his face. “If we weren’t out in the open, I’d let you,” she told him.

While he may not kiss her, she was the chancellor, after all, that wasn’t going to stop him from providing the woman he loved under the title some form of comfort. Besides, he was done burying his love for her.

He reached up, cradled her cheek in his hand letting his thumb ghost along her cheekbone. She leaned into his touch, then reached up closing her hand over his.

“Sir, the troop is ready.”

He sighed. “May we meet again.”

She nodded, took a deep breath and gave him one last small smile as they both dropped their hands. “We will.”


	2. Chapter 2

A sob broke through, and Abby took a deep breath, willing herself to get control of her emotions as this wasn’t the time for them. They were being shot at and right now she had to focus getting inside the collapsed building because there were people still alive, buried in the rubble that was once Ton DC. 

_ God, Marcus where are you? _

She should have never let him go. She had an uneasy feeling about this whole mission right from the start and now as she ducked behind the slab of broken stone she realized he might not have survived. 

An ache, deep and hollow threatened to overwhelm her. No, she wasn’t doing this again. She couldn’t. Losing Marcus wasn’t an option. He was there somewhere; she just had to find him.

There were people alive inside. She just needed to find a way in. Watching, she waited until there was a distraction. Her heart was beating hard in her chest as she ran the short distance to the small hole that led down inside the once building. 

The sound she heard before continued to reverberate through the room. It was dark and the cement block shifted beneath her feet. The sound grew louder and louder the further in she went and she shined her light towards the source, her breath catching in her chest when she saw him.

“Marcus!”

When he didn’t reply she quickened her steps as much as she dared. And just as she reached him he was lifting his hand, grabbing ahold of the rod that he had been banging to get someone’s attention. 

By his side, she lifted her hand and took his. Only then did his gaze fall on her. 

“Abby,” he breathed.

She swallowed, feeling a sob want to break through. “Marcus, it’s okay. I’m here.”

“I can’t move my leg.”

“The beam cut into your leg. It’s bleeding but not too bad. I’m going to try and get you out of here.”

“That could be Clarke.”

“I’m not leaving you,” she told him in a tone angrier than she meant to. Clarke’s betrayal cut her deep. The mere thought that her own daughter could be a part of something that just killed hundreds of people made her sick to her stomach. As if she already hadn’t felt horrible enough. 

“Abby-”

“Marcus, it’s not Clarke.” His brow furrowed and her face softened. He was only worried about her, and while his concern for her over his own warmed a place in her heart, now wasn’t the time to explain everything. “She’s fine. She’s with Lexa. I’m going to try and get some of this loose so we can get your leg free.” She took the flashlight, trying to get a better look at his wound. “Can you move your toes?”

“Yeah.”

Abby drew in a breath. There was a fair amount of blood, but not a lot which was a relief. “Good. I don’t think anything is broken.” Taking a look around, there was no way she was going to be able to lift the beam off of him by herself. “I’m going to need to get something. These are all too heavy to try and lift. I’ll be right back.”

There had to be something she could use. Most of the floor was covered in broken slabs of the ceiling and splintered wood. The wood wouldn’t do. She’d need something stronger, something… That’s when she noticed it. A metal bar. 

“Okay, I found this. It’s worth a try until someone can get to us. Ready?”

“As I’ll ever be.”

Using her upper body strength, she was able to lift it though she immediately regretted it. Blood gushed from the wound. Her breath hitched. It was his femoral artery. She couldn’t lift it and risk him bleeding out before she could get a tourniquet around his leg. 

“Oh God, Marcus don’t move. Don’t move!” She let the beam drop as gently as she could but he still cried out in pain. “I’m sorry! The weight of the beam is keeping you alive. I need to make a tourniquet before we move it.”

“Abby, no just... Don’t worry about me.”

“No.”

“Abby-” There was a noise and then shaking. Suddenly Marcus’ arms were around her. She closed her eyes, pressed her head against his chest, and held onto him while the building came down around them. She could only just barely hear the words,  _ Oh god _ , and as quickly as it began it stopped. 

A heartbeat passed and another, she lifted her head. They had been spared this time, but what about the next? “Marcus, are you alright?”

“Yeah. You?” His face was covered in dust she could imagine she looked much the same. She could taste it in her mouth, see it still could the air around them.

“I’m okay,” she whispered. “Someone will come help us.”

“Sure.” The doubt in his tone was prevalent. She let out a breath. The other’s knew where she had gone. She made eye contact with Octavia before she went in. She was confident they’d be able to take care of the sniper and get to them. It was only a matter of when. 

She woke with a jolt. Abby hadn’t meant to fall asleep. How long had it been? Minutes, hours could have gone by from the time she rested her head on his chest until now. 

Gazing up, she saw she hadn’t been the only one to fall asleep. Marcus was still, too still. She tightened her hold and shook him. “Marcus, wake up.” 

He didn’t move. 

Panic began to course through her. “Marcus,” she said in a stronger more demanding voice.

He let out a groan. “I’m so cold, Abby.”

“I know, I am too. But you have to walk up.” Again, nothing. “Marcus, wake up. I need you to stay with me.”

“I’ll always be with you…” he said, words faint as his breathing.

Tears filled her eyes and spilled down her cheeks. No, she wouldn’t let him give up on her. She needed him now more than ever. 

“Marcus it’s so much more than that,” Abby began. She didn’t want to tell him like this. When she imagined telling him about the baby she pictured them in her quarters, lying together after making love, not buried under a pile of rubble not knowing if they were going to survive if it came crashing down around them again. But she needed something to give him to distract him. And if this didn’t rouse him, nothing would. Taking his face between her hands she told him, “You have to stay with me. You’re going to be a father, Marcus.”

His eyes fluttered.  _ Yes, that’s it _ .  _ Stay with me, Marcus.  _ His voice was low, a croaked disbelieving breath of a whisper, “What?”

She swallowed, held his gaze that was now intently holding hers. “I’m pregnant.”

It took him a minute. Whether it was processing the information she told him or coming back from the exhaustion that had nearly pulled him under she didn’t know, probably both. “But, how?”

She laughed. It was a watery thing that she couldn’t help because,  _ of course  _ that’d be his first question. “It’s my fault. I should have told you before but we were on the ArK with so little time left and I thought it didn’t matter.”

His eyes drifted up, looking straight ahead. His tone filled with what she hoped to be wonder when he finally said, “A baby.”

“Yes, a baby,” she echoed, moving herself up more to draw his gaze back to her. “And it’s just as strong and stubborn as it’s father so you have to stay awake and keep talking to me because I’m not doing this without you, Marcus Kane, do you hear me?”

The light laugh that left him made her heart flutter. “I hear you.” She breathed a sigh of relief, and all fell silent for a heartbeat then he said, “I gotta admit, I never thought I’d be a father.”

“I could say the same about having another child.”

“And you’re okay?” he asked, his brow furrowed in concern. 

She reached up and with her thumbs smoothed away the worry from his brow. “I am. I’ve been tired but I’m okay.”

As if just realizing where they were and the danger they were in, his eyes flashed and he said, “God, Abby, you should leave-”

She shook her head. “No, Marcus I’m not leaving you.”

He opened his mouth and she knew he was about to argue, but then the sound of shifting rock and then light spilled into the cavern. 

“Abby! Kane!”

Octavia.

Tears filled her eyes once again. And the smile that she wore when she looked back into Marcus’ eyes was probably big and stupid, but damnit she didn’t care. There were going to get out of this. She was going to fix his leg and they were going to go home.

She reached up and ran her thumb across his stubbled cheek and whispered,  “We’re gonna be okay.”

* * *

 

But they weren’t okay, he thought, remembering only a few short days ago when she’d told him she was pregnant.

Well, they  _ had _ been. Up until they were on their way back to camp they were ambushed and taken to Mt Weather. 

A chill swept through Marcus as he watched her sleep. He should be sleeping too but knew as soon as he shut his eyes the dreams would come. Listening to her deep even breaths made him want to drift off for the last half an hour. His leg ached but it was nothing compared to her wounds, and regardless of how uncomfortable the chair he was sitting in was, he wasn’t about to move from her side. 

But as much as he fought sleep, soon his eyes fell closed.  _ A few minutes _ , he thought. 

_ “No! Get away from her!” He had pleaded to Cage. To the men dragging Abby across the room. “Put me on the table, not her!” _

_ “It’s too late,” Cage had said, his voice hollow sounding to Marcus’ ears. _

_ Taking Abby had been out of revenge. Clarke had killed his father, and now Cage was returning the favor. God damn her! If she had only known. “You can’t do this,” he had cried out, “Please, I’ll do anything.” _

_ “Bring my father back.” _

_ Marcus swallowed. “I can’t do that.” _

_ The younger man's cold gaze held his. “I’m afraid I can’t stop this.” He turned back to his men. “Get on with it.” _

_ “No! Goddamnit, not her! Take me! Take me!” _

_ He struggled against the cuffs at the sound of the drills. Her screams filled the room, no thoughts, not even the pain of the metal cutting into his skin could break through the canopy of rage in his mind. But as much as he struggled, he could only watch as the woman he loved with his entire being, the mother of his child cried out in absolute agony.  _

_ The sounds of her screams had torn at his very soul.  _

_ Marcus had become a man of peace on the ground, but he would murder them all with his bare hands if he could.  _

_ Luckily, he never had to. He got to watch as they all cried out in their own misery. Watched as they fell to the floor while the radiation slowly, but not slowly enough, killed them all.  _

_ And yet, to his complete frustration, he still couldn’t get to her. He cried out her name over and over again to get her to look at him. Her head fell to the side, her eyes fluttered open at held his before closing once again. Five, ten minutes passed- then finally the doors opened.  _

_ Again, it was Octavia coming to the rescue.  _

_ Come on, come on, come on! he had thought, while waiting as she unlocked the cuffs. Once free, he limped as quickly as he could to Abby. Her eyes slowly opened and she whispered his name. He unhooked the strap across her neck then her wrists, all the while murmuring soft words of assurance.  _

_ “I’m okay,” she said once she was free. Tears filled her eyes, and despite the white-hot anger that still filled him, his burned with his own tears. _

_ He helped her sit up, and took her face gently between his hands. Their eyes held a moment before their brows fell softly together. Damn whoever saw, whoever would judge them.  _

_ “I’m sorry I couldn’t stop this from happening.” _

_ She sniffed and shook her head. “It’s not your fault.” _

_ “I love you, Abby,” he whispered through a choked sob, not caring who might overhear him. “I love you so much.” _

_ “I know. I love you, too.” _

_ He placed a kiss on her forehead. They stood there holding one another until the doors banged open emitting Clarke. _

They only returned from the mountain the previous night. Between his leg and Abby’s own wounds, they hadn’t had a chance to really talk since. Abby had been attended to by Jackson, they both spent the night in medical until that morning when he was satisfied Abby and the baby were fine he released her to her quarters as long as Marcus kept an eye on her and the both agreed to rest.

His eyes flew up to her face hearing her soft groan.

“Hey, you’re awake.”

“Barely.” She grimaced shifting slightly onto her side. “How long have I been asleep?”

“A few hours.”

“Has there been any word on Clarke?”

He shook his head, hating seeing the disappointment in her eyes. “We’ll give her a few days, then send out a team to look for her.”

“I just wish she would have said something. I didn’t even get a chance to talk to her.”

“I know.” His eyes widened watching her try to sit up. He got to his feet and helped her adjust the pillows behind her into a comfortable propped up position. “Do you need anything? Something to drink?”

“Some water would be good.”

He got up and limped over to the desk where a pitcher of water and two glasses sat. “Here.”

“Mm, thank you.” She drank most of the glass before handing it to him. He returned it to the table and she fell back against the bed, closing her eyes. “I feel like I could sleep for weeks.”

He chuckled and intended to return to his seat but she pulled back the covers and he didn’t need any more of an invitation. Taking a seat beside her, he drew a breath and asked the question that had been burning in his mind since their time under the rubble. “So tell me, now that I’ve got you alone and there’s no danger of us being abducted anytime soon,” he paused, placed his hand tentatively on her stomach, and she moved her hand, placing it over his to reassure him she didn’t mind. “How did this happen?”

She let out a breath while her fingertips caressed over the back of his hand. “I had headaches.”

He tilted his head to the side. “Headaches?”

“From my implant. Some women get them as a side effect.” She blew out a breath between her lips. “But it was the law to have one so I dealt with the symptoms. Then Jake was floated and I didn't see any reason to suffer the headaches anymore because I didn’t ever plan on being with anyone again. The first time we were together I didn’t think about the consequences, and then the second time we thought we were going to die so what did it matter? And when we got down here everything was so complicated, we were all too busy finding our footing. I was going to talk to you about how we should be careful until I got the implant replaced but then I found out and it was a little late for that.” Her gaze met his. He knew she was waiting for him to speak but he felt his voice left him. Too overcome with astonishment how they found themselves in this situation after all that had happened. “Marcus, tell me what you’re thinking.”

“Oh, well,” he cleared his throat. The corners of his mouth pulled up thinking of how reckless they had been. “I admit I hadn't thought about precautions. I assumed you still had… but if it caused you discomfort we could always do other things to prevent… I mean, later... after this baby’s born. If you still wanted to take this further.”

He could feel the heat rise in his face, as he fumbled through his speech. Abby rolled her eyes.“ Marcus, you can be very dense when you want to be. You aren’t getting away that easy.”

He shook his head.. “I still can’t believe it. Even then, with your implant removed, on the first time?”

She glowered at him.  “It  _ is _ possible you know.”

“No, I know, I'm just… I guess I’m just still-”

“Shocked.”

He laughed. “Yeah.” Bringing her hand up, he kissed the back of her hand. “If you don’t mind I’m going to lock you in the Ark for the next six months.”

Her chin lowered right along with her tone. “I do mind. I mind very much.”

Another chuckled then he kissed her again. “I should go and let you get some rest.”

Her hand grasped his keeping him from moving from her. “Marcus, stay. You need rest too, and I know we’ll both sleep better this way.”

His lips pulled up. “You’re right about that.”

He rid himself of his boots and pants, sleeping only in his underwear and tee. Once they were settled, he on his side and her on her back, she asked. “How’s your leg?”

“A little sore but fine. Jackson redid a few of the stitches.”

“We make a great pair. Bandaged and broken.” She slid closer, and he wrapped his arm around her middle pressing into his warmth.

“We do, but it’s nothing that can’t heal. Nothing we can’t get through together.” He kissed her temple and closed his eyes, relishing in the feeling of having her safe and in his arms.

“What kind of parents are we? Bringing a child into this world, Marcus?”

“I don’t know how to answer that, Abby. All we can do is protect him or her. Make sure they know they’re loved.”

She reached up, her hand was warm on his cheek. “You’re going to be a wonderful father.”

“I certainly hope so.” He grinned. Watching flooding his chest making him feel lighter and happier than he could ever remember feeling. “I never thought it was in the cards for me.”

Her face softened, a small smile playing across her lips. “I’ve always pictured you with a son,” she said. He raised his eyebrows, amused she imagined such a thing. “Especially lately, seeing the way you are with Bellamy and the rest of the kids. He needs someone who believes in him as you do.”

“Really? Here I’ve been sitting here watching you sleep and picturing us with a girl.”

“Oh?” She chuckled. 

“Mmhmm.” He reaches up and tucked a strand of hair away from her face. “She’ll look just like you. Be just as defiant and curious, and have me wrapped right around her finger.”

Abby rolled her eyes. “With two of us, you’d be useless.” He laughed at that and didn’t argue. Her look grew serious, and she asked, “We can do this, right?”

He nodded and pressed a kiss to her lips. “We can. I love you.” 

“I love you, too.”

“Get some sleep.” His hand drifted down to rest over her abdomen where their child was safe. He closed his eyes at the feeling of her hand sliding over his. They could do this. With a truce with the grounders and the threat of Mt Weather gone he was sure together they could overcome whatever new challenges came to make a safe world for their child. 


End file.
